Healthy Momma, Happy Momma

 Healthy Momma, Happy Momma

by Nahyr Galaz Ruiz

As women we constantly juggle an endless list of roles; mother, wife, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, professional, community member…the list goes on.  Our various roles demand our last shred of energy and sometimes sanity; this is why self-care is so important.  And yet, self-care is what we tend to neglect the most.  There’s a reason why the flight attendant instructs you to put the oxygen mask on yourself first then your child; because you can’t take care of anyone else until you take care of yourself. 

And yet so often we put the oxygen mask on everyone else before ourselves; sometimes not even putting it on at all. 

This past week I received a not so gentle reminder of why it’s important to prioritize self-care.  Trust me; I KNOW the struggle.  You’re talking to the queen of “stuffing my face with cookies and chocolate while locked in my bathroom,” and the “2 minutes after my kids are in bed you can find me sneaking ice cream on the couch straight from the tub.” I’m also the master of “its 9pm and I’ve had a handful of goldfish, coffee, and a mint all day.”  I realized though; that I can’t be my best self for my sweet, beautiful girls if I’m not taking care of myself.  So this week I joined Beachbody and have begun drinking their shakes, working out daily, and have been working on eating healthier.

Let’s be real for a sec; it’s hard.  But in the long term it is completely worth it.  Last night I had to squeeze in my workout at 9:30pm and shake at 10pm.  This morning I did my workout as soon as I returned from dropping off my eldest at preschool; I had to pause a couple times because my 19 month old was gleefully weaving between my limbs (planking with a toddler commando crawling under you is a CHALLENGE!); but I got it done- Nevermind that my 19 month old transferred our dog’s dry food from her bowl to her water bowl to make puppy cereal while I was finishing my workout…Never mind that.  So I get it, it’s hard to find spaces to take care of yourself.  But If that wakeup call from my hubby’s doctor visit taught me anything is that you just have to; there are tiny humans relying on you for everything; Love, Energy, Support, Learning, Comfort, Food, Health- EVERYTHING.  Let’s be our best selves so we can provide it!

And let’s support each other through it! I’m actively looking for healthy fish, chicken, and salad recipes to add to my lunch and dinner planning for my family! Feel free to comment with your yummiest and healthiest recipes! I’ll be your village; share if you’ve started a journey to health or if you’ve been on one for a while already! I’d love to hear from you fierce mommas!

Don't Forget the "Us"

  Don't Forget the "Us"

by Nahyr Galaz Ruiz

March 13, 2017

Last week was my husband and I’s anniversary; our eleventh dating anniversary, fifth marriage anniversary, and fourth wedding anniversary.  We kicked off the celebrating with dinner and a ballet show (you can read my review of the show here) on our actual anniversary and then had a weekend getaway in Catalina Island for three days.  We have two young girls ages four years and eighteen months old, so you can imagine how rare a couple’s getaway is for us.  The stars have to align, we have to pray to multiple gods to ensure no one falls ill, we have to hope the weekend in question happens to fall on a weekend in which grandparents and aunts and uncles can team up together to care for the girls or on a weekend when their godparents area available, we have to find care for our dog, and we have to coordinate dropping the girls off in San Diego, which is anywhere between one and a half to two hours away.  Needless to say, and I’m sure many of you out there can relate, planning even a short weekend getaway requires a great deal of careful planning, orchestrating, and executing.

However, this past weekend it became clear as my husband and I strolled hand in hand down the beautiful streets of Avalon, just how important it is that you make the effort to give your relationship the reprieve of a few days of child-free romance.  Let’s get real; raising tiny humans is a stressful, full time job.  Don’t get me wrong; parenthood is an amazing gift.  There are so many rewards and the rewards far outweigh the inconveniences, lack of privacy, constant asking of everything of yourself, etc… At the end of the day you have these beautiful tiny beings whom you love more than life itself.  But let’s not kid ourselves; raising kids is no walk in the park.  You constantly wonder if you’re doing the right thing or making the right choices.  If they get sick; you worry yourself literally sick.  You hardly sleep.  Your life is most likely an endless stream of hours packing things; food, clothing, diapers, drinks, snacks, toys, etc and then unpacking it all.  It is an endless stream of hours picking up toys, doing laundry, keeping them out of light sockets or from eating the dog food, driving them to and from classes, school, and play dates, making them food and then fighting with them about not eating the food you JUST MADE…. You get the point; and if you’re a parent (and you probably are if you’re reading this), you GET it.  And that’s precisely the point; raising children is hard, it’s not for the faint of heart.  That stress can strain your relationship with your spouse.  Even the most solid of relationships can become victim to the bickering or snappy responses that stem from an overwhelmed, over tired, and stressed out parent.  For this reason, it is so important that you find time away from the kids.

Regular date nights are a must; I know, if you’re like us and don’t have family immediately nearby, date nights can get expensive.  $12 an hour adds up, not to mention the cost of dinner and maybe movie…It gets expensive fast; but it’s an investment into your relationship.  And the occasional weekend getaway is also extremely important; it’s a time to reconnect with your spouse, uninterrupted, worry-free, and care-free.  It’s a time to remember the couple you were before children; to romance one another, to indulge in each other’s one-hundred percent unrivaled attention. We spend so much time nurturing our babies, ensuring that we give them our time, our love, our attention; but sometimes in the process, in the vie quotidienne, we forget about ourselves (another topic for another day; self-care), and our partners. 

In my opinion, here’s the danger in that: if you don’t take time to be a couple, to reconnect, to romance one another, what relationship will you have when your babies leave the nest? When they’ve grown and it’s time for them to fly into the world on their own? What will you relationship look like? Will you recognize one another? Will you know how to be together?

The past eleven years, hell, the past five years even, have taught me that time really does fly.  Life really can pass in the blink of an eye.  Our babies won’t be babies forever, and of course we want to revel in and soak up every moment; but you must also remember your relationship with your spouse.  Relationships also take tendering, love, devotion, and care.  Relationships also require attention, constant nurturing, and quality time.

You and your partner will be so grateful you took a getaway, trust me; it opens your communication, it reconnects you to your love, it keeps your relationship grounded and healthy.  It teaches your children the kind of relationships and love you want for them later on.  Above all it allows you the space to be the best parents you can be for your children.